To Avoid an Idle Mind, I Work a 9 to 5

As I get older, work/life balance is a requirement.  The famous Dolly Parton sung it best, 9 to 5, who by the way is my corporate idol…why not?  She has big hair, tatas, and sings in the office.  I enjoy going to work, but I also look forward to getting off, but believe me when I say I need to go to work...I really need to go to work.

Like they say an idle mind is a devil's workshop. And if I'm at home for long periods of time, doing nothing.  This might be what happens...or did it?

1.  I couldn't make excuses for not cleaning or performing any other domestic chores.  Usually I would easily tell my son that I’m not cooking or cleaning because I’m tired…I’ve been at work all day…it’s a long day….every man for themselves tonight…but without working it’s just extreme laziness.

2.  I would realize there's nothing on daytime television.

3.  Since nothing is on daytime television, I would watch all my On Demand television shows that I will usually watch on Friday's night.

4.  Question my life  because On Demand is my Friday night highlight.

5.   Masturbate

6.  Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

7.  Masturbate

8.  Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

9.  Wake up and realize I still have several  hours to go and numbers 5-8 can go on...and on...and on...you get the point.

10. I could start the DIY project that Pinterest so easily influenced me to start, a year in a half ago.

11.  MIFM, My Inner Fat Me you met her previous blog, is  in control of the menu choices.

  Corn tortillas

  Corn tortillas in the microwave

  Corn tortillas in the microwave with cheese

  Corn tortillas in the microwave with two different cheeses

  Corn tortillas in the frying pan with cheese

  Corn tortilla in the frying pan with 2 servings of cheese and salsa

Do you see the pattern?

12.  I wouldn't record any of the grand cuisines MIFM created on Weight Watchers Tracker...whatever Ms. Hudson...keep your singing to yourself today.

  

13.  I cursed the mysterious littler person who continues to steal or hide things from me…"CURSE YOU IMP…WHERE'S MY GOT DAMN CAR KEY....AND GLASSES...EARRINGS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

14.  I question if there really is an imp, or am I losing my mind.

15.  Since I don’t know, I immediately pray.

16.  I realize how much I miss people at work, but can't tell them because they're working, and don't have time to talk...texting is just so impersonal.

It's all about looking the part

Needless to say I need to go to work, and I'll just use my PTO for vacation time like everybody else.

Until next time…