Warning: The skit you're about to read is based on a true story. Certain character images have been changed in order to protect the privacy of others.
It's a typical #CubicleLife day; and Cube Girl is
10:00 AM-Energy Level Semi 1. Cube Girl started to talk to herself in third person to control her erratic emotions.
CUBE GIRL: WAAAAAIIIITTT AAAAAAA MINUTE!!!! My manager, ain't even here!
CUBE GIRL: Hey TM, you gotta a sec?
CUBE GIRL: Ummmmm...you scheduled a meeting with me at four
[Now the hand gestures are in full effect. In addition, she just used the word "fo" instead of "four". Immediately, she imagined her mother popping her in the back of her head for using incorrect grammar. She regrouped.]
[Now TM is still confused, matter of fact even more than before. Cube Girl works from 8 to 5 so why wouldn't she discuss "work related issues" at four.]
10:20 AM Level 10
TM chimes in confused still.
Cube Girl here's "office hours" and flashbacks to the email she received and realized she went too far.
Energy Level 1
CUBE GIRL: (Chuckling and hands slapping thighs) Ohhhhhhhhh, it's the office hours.
checking, responding, and deleting emails. Although the concert was last night, she's imitating all the Beyonce moves with as many shoulder motions as possible. In other words, she's there, but not there.
Her energy level is at an all time high, and it's not even 10 AM
CUBE GIRL: Who run this mother (stank face mode)! Who run this mother (IG pic)...Girls!!!
9:56 AM-Fifteen songs in, she received another email notification from TM. Energy level immediately decreases to 1.
CUBE GIRL: Hmmm...TM wants to schedule a meeting with me. I wonder why? I haven't done an audit for her. Have I? Is it just us? (reviewing the email again, and confused by the answer) Yeah, it is....hmmmmmm?
9:58 AM-Energy level 10+
CUBE GIRL: HOLD UP?! (Eyebrows raised) She scheduled a meeting at four. OH HELLLL NAWWWW!!!!!! THEY TRYING TO GET RID OF ME!!!!"
10:00 AM-Energy Level Semi 1. Cube Girl started to talk to herself in third person to control her erratic emotions.
CUBE GIRL: Hold on now Cube Girl, lets be rational about this. Woo Saahhh (large inhale) Just breathe (exhale). This might be a dramatic moment. Yeah Cube Girl, you tripping...she's not your immediatel manager. She can't do that. Let's check and see if your manager is here today anyway. Yeah, just calm down (motioning her hands in a downward motion) Breathe girl...(inhale) breathe...(exhale).
10:03 AM-Energy Level 10++
CUBE GIRL: WAAAAAIIIITTT AAAAAAA MINUTE!!!! My manager, ain't even here!
[A flashback of an incident occurred in her head involving TM and Cube Girl's bossom on display. Cube Girl obviously didn't think they were out enough to be called into a room. She accessorized appropriately. Besides everybody was doing it.]
10:05 AM-Energy Level at 10+++
CUBE GIRL: OHHHHHHHH HELL NAWWWW!!!! They about to have her pull me in that room, again,on their behalf...mmmmhhmmmm....just like they did last time when I wore that outfit. SERIOUSLY!!! This is over that! OMG they're so over the top!
10:08 AM-Energy level at 10++++ colored girl moment officially on.
CUBE GIRL: Well, I ain't waiting to talk about this at fo. Damn that! I'm, going right now! They gotta another thing coming if they feel like this is how it's about to go down (shaking her head). Got me working until fo before they take me in the room, OH HELLLL NAWWW!!!! Got me twisted.
[She proceeded down the corridor, in her "You told Hopo to beat me" stance. She realized that her energy level is still at a 10++++. Two more cubicles to go before approaching destination, and she was able to stabilize at an even 10.]
10:10 AM-Energy Level 10
CUBE GIRL: Hey TM, you gotta a sec?
TM: Oh, hey Cube Girl. Yeah, what can I help you with?
The warm smile from TM kinda soothed her.
10:12 AM-Energy Level 1
CUBE GIRL: Ummmmm...you scheduled a meeting with me at four
TM: "Huh? What meeting?"
10:13 AM-Cube Girl recognized TM's confusion, but proceeded to refresh her memory. Energy level 10++
CUBE GIRL: The meeting you scheduled at fo. I haven't did an audit for you in months. Sooooo (random hand gestures), I'm trying to understand...why we need to have a meeting at the end of the day?
[Now the hand gestures are in full effect. In addition, she just used the word "fo" instead of "four". Immediately, she imagined her mother popping her in the back of her head for using incorrect grammar. She regrouped.]
10:17 AM-Energy Level 1
CUBE GIRL: "All I'm going to say is (clapping hands and speaking simultaneously to the beat of each word) I'm not going...to no conference room...at "four" (she realized while trying to make point you should always anuciate). Soooooo (still clapping)...whatever we need to talk about....we can talk about it now (duck lip mouth). I'm not going to wait till foooouuuurrr to talk about any "work related" issues.
[Now TM is still confused, matter of fact even more than before. Cube Girl works from 8 to 5 so why wouldn't she discuss "work related issues" at four.]
10:20 AM Level 10
CUBE GIRL: Also, for the record! (index finger up in the air to make her point) If this is about that outfit, which was just a one time issue, I am dressed appropriately (she turns around and poses with arms cross allowing TM time to observe). SEE! TAKE A GOOD LOOK!
TM chimes in confused still.
10:24 AM
TM: "Cube Girl, are you talking about the meeting request letting every one know about my"Office Hours" from four to five today?"
TM: "Cube Girl, are you talking about the meeting request letting every one know about my"Office Hours" from four to five today?"
Cube Girl here's "office hours" and flashbacks to the email she received and realized she went too far.
TM's Office Hours
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Energy Level 1
CUBE GIRL: (Chuckling and hands slapping thighs) Ohhhhhhhhh, it's the office hours.
TM: Yes, office hours. Anybody can attend. It was only a FYI.
Energy Level 1
10:27 AM
CUBE GIRL: Baha ha ha ha well okaaaaayyy. A little awkward right now. (Cracking up laughing)) I'll see you at four then...with everybody else. Okay talk to u later...ha ha ha. I'm going to go back to my desk, until four comes. Soooooo... Ummmmm...my bad. I had a moment.
TM: Are you good now?
CUBE GIRL: Oh yeah girl, I'm good. I'll see you at four (chuckle),
Cube Girl walks back towards her desk. She's a little embarrassed, but yet liberated. She puts on her headphones and back to lip syncing business as usual.
Until next time....
